


that resounding echo

by PutItBriefly



Category: InuYasha - A Feudal Fairy Tale
Genre: F/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-11-30
Updated: 2020-11-30
Packaged: 2021-03-09 21:39:47
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 10,462
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/27793192
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PutItBriefly/pseuds/PutItBriefly
Summary: Evidently, saying she was lonely ranked among demon attacks and Inuyasha’s night of vulnerability in terms of situations Lord Sesshoumaru felt required his prompt assistance.It was embarrassing.Master Jaken was not with him. No doubt he had been left fast asleep in a campsite somewhere. That Lord Sesshoumaru had not bothered to hassle his faithful vassal suggested he acted with a haste Rin’s complaint did not warrant.*Rin resolves to tell Sesshoumaru how she feels about him.She does not.
Relationships: Rin/Sesshoumaru (InuYasha)
Comments: 38
Kudos: 237





	that resounding echo

_Crescent_ was too generous for the sliver of moon hanging in the sky, its light scarcely brighter than the twinkling stars around it. 

Stars were lucky.

There were so many of them!

In some places, especially where the river of the Milky Way flowed thickest, the light was so evenly dispersed that it was impossible to tell star from star. In other places, the stars stood further apart, their individual radiance cast in stark relief against a blackish blue backdrop. Stars felt no loneliness. They never strained their ears, _listening._

And, they were luminous and beautiful. They shared their stories in pictures drawn in dots across the heavens. The moon had stories, too, like Princess Kaguya and a rabbit pounding rice. In Kagome’s stories, men flew through the sky in pillars of fire, landed on the moon and walked around on it. Of course, Princess Kaguya had more panache than some foreign lord planting his flag on a mottled white rock spinning far, far above his lands. And the dim glow and inconsistent face of the moon in the sky could never compare to the vibrant purple crescent in the center of Lord Sesshoumaru’s forehead.

Rin frowned at the sky. She picked out constellations, recited their stories, and envied the stars. Never lonely, always reliably accompanying their chosen moon.

She ought to go back inside and try to fall asleep. There would be work to do tomorrow. Staying up half the night talking to herself about an ogre chasing a pair of sisters and their pail of water would be no excuse for her chores to go neglected come morning. Instead, she sat on the shrine steps dressed in the old linen kimono she typically used for a blanket.

The younger sister chased the moon across the sky even after the orge bit her foot off. She never seemed to catch up.

It must be lonely, chasing someone who won’t be caught.

The silence of a village at night was lonely.

Rin hated silence.

Silence was like…

An ogre was chasing her, ready to gnaw her feet right off and keep her from running forever, or a ship slowly filling with water, doomed to sink but unable to right itself, or the darkness that came when the oil was gone.

Sometimes, Rin spoke just to reassure herself that she still could.

_“I’m_ lonely.”

Another lonely life, that of the shooting star, hurtling so quickly across the sky that could not be a proper companion to the moon or other stars. Rin stood. It was a silly compulsion. She was not any closer to a star standing than sitting. Eyes shut, she made a wish.

Most shooting stars continued their journey with nary an indication they cared one jot about the wishes they heard. _This_ star plunged downwards. When it was about at her eye level, it stopped its descent.

Rin held her breath.

For the span of a heartbeat or two, the star stayed suspended in place, studying her from about an arm’s length away. Then it grew. It stretched itself into a long, thin oval. It expanded from the sides. The edges morphed, taking on definition, becoming the silhouette of a man. The glow subsided.

And there at the shrine steps stood Lord Sesshoumaru.

“Rin.”

“You heard me?”

He did not answer. His presence was the proof that he had.

Years ago, Master Jaken had told her Lord Sesshoumaru was always listening. It was the only piece of a rather long diatribe she’d only half heard that Rin could remember. When she was 14, she had fallen off a ladder while picking peaches. It was not a long fall. It was over before she really registered she had lost her balance. Any other time, Rin would have walked away from such a fall brushing the dust off her kosode, but that day, she had landed poorly and fractured one of the thin bones in her forearm.

Rin had hit the ground before she screamed.

The two friends who had gone to the orchard with her danced around Rin in panicked indecision. Should they take her to Kaede? Or have Kaede come to her? Was the shock so great that Rin must be carried or could she walk home? Before the girls made their choice, Lord Sesshoumaru had appeared in a fury, propelled on long clouds of fur.

Rin’s memory of the whole incident was poor--a common occurrence, she was assured. According to Kagome, Lord Sesshoumaru had terrified Rin’s friends, carried her to Kaede himself and seen her arm set. He had said nothing that Rin could remember, but Master Jaken had been deeply offended on his lord’s behalf. To listen to Master Jaken, one would think Rin had fallen to purposefully prevent Lord Sesshoumaru from rescuing her in time. Their lord was always listening, he had said. Lord Sesshoumaru knew the difference between idle chatter and genuine need, Master Jaken had said. If Rin expected Lord Sesshoumaru to save her, she must take better care to scream _before_ she was injured.

Rin couldn’t remember if she had told the little imp she screamed because it _hurt_ and not for Lord Sesshoumaru’s benefit. She was sure only that Master Jaken had told her Lord Sesshoumaru always knew when she needed him, and that he would always come for her.

Never had Rin felt compelled to test that.

After all, he always appeared when the village was under attack. He always came on the night of the new moon.

Evidently, telling the stars she was lonely ranked among demon attacks and Inuyasha’s night of vulnerability in terms of situations Lord Sesshoumaru felt required his prompt assistance. 

It was embarrassing.

Master Jaken was not with him. No doubt he had been left fast asleep in a campsite somewhere. That Lord Sesshoumaru had not bothered to hassle his faithful vassal suggested he acted with a haste Rin’s complaint did not warrant.

“Thank you.” A kinder, more generous soul did not exist.

That tiny little crescent in the sky told her she would have seen Lord Sesshoumaru tomorrow, and he still came.

He visited in between new moons, of course, on his way here or there, often with gifts and always with Master Jaken clinging to his fur and proclaiming new tales of Lord Sesshoumaru’s unparalleled might. Were he to come only on the new moon, anyone paying attention would realize there was an exploitable weakness in the village. The intermediate visits were camouflage. Lord Sesshoumaru was being _practical._

Rin appreciated that he came so often anyway.

She wished to sing of his victories. She wished to know which was his favorite constellation and hear the legends dog demons told. She wished to be trusted with his idle thoughts, his heaviest burdens, his hopes for the future. She wished to go home to him at night, the way her friends went home to their husbands, instead of to a matronly priestess kind enough to raise whatever orphan stumbled to her doorstep. She wanted to feel his mouth hot against--

“How are you?” Rin squeaked.

Lord Sesshoumaru seemed to ponder the question for a long while, though it was likely that what he considered so carefully was whether he cared to answer at all. “I am well. And you?”

“I was lonely, but you knew that, and now I’m not because you’re here and you are my most important person.”

Lord Sesshoumaru turned his face upwards, to the moon that could not compare to his own.

“Master Jaken will be upset when he wakes up and you’re gone.”

“I will be displeased if he is unable to locate me.”

“There’s a new moon tomorrow.”

Lord Sesshoumaru inclined his head so that some of his hair fell across his face. He sectioned off one lock, draped it over his shoulder and combed it with his fingers. “Indeed.”

* * *

Just as exhaustion would have been no excuse to neglect her chores, so was Lord Sesshoumaru. Rin had stumbled off to bed when she could no longer get out a full sentence without yawning. She was unprepared for morning. Rin struggled through breakfast with bleary eyes and heavy limbs.

When she went outside, Lord Sesshoumaru was nowhere to be seen. On a typical new moon visit, he arrived at sunset and left at sunrise. Rin would sit up all night with him if Kaede let her, but always, she was made to come inside. The first chore of the day was weeding the herb garden with Kagome. Rin walked slowly, surreptitiously peering around every corner in the hopes of seeing Lord Sesshoumaru. Could he have left until Inuyasha’s demon blood went dormant? Had he pitied poor Master Jaken and went to fetch him after all?

“Is everything okay?” 

“Hm?” A yawn shuddered.

Kagome appeared studiously nonchalant. “Sesshoumaru came early. Inuyasha and I thought something might have happened.”

The garden seemed to stretch out forever. Rin couldn’t remember ever having trouble knowing where to begin before. “No, everything’s fine.”

Kagome knelt down in the first row. She gestured to the second and Rin shuffled to it. “You seem really tired this morning.”

“I should have gone to bed earlier,” Rin admitted, “but Lord Sesshoumaru came to see me. I couldn’t be rude.” The thought of leaving his side had never occurred to her until it was that or collapse into his fur. Lord Sesshoumaru’s fur _looked_ inviting, but that alone was not sufficient permission to touch it.

“Taking care of yourself isn’t rude.”

Cross, the petulant thought that Kagome could never understand fluttered across Rin’s mind. What did Kagome know about missing someone? _A lot,_ she remembered. Kagome had been separated from Inuyasha for three entire years! Yes, Rin’s time in the village away from Lord Sesshoumaru was much longer than that, but he visited often. She had not wrestled with the fear that she may never see him again in years, not since she was a little girl left with A-Un while he went to accomplish dangerous things, refusing to answer her when she asked if he would come back. 

Lord Sesshoumaru always came back.

When Kagome was trapped on the other side of the well, she and Inuyasha didn’t know if they would ever see each other again.

“He’s not that selfish, you know.”

Rin realized she had not been paying attention. “Huh?”

“Sesshoumaru. He wouldn’t want you to do anything bad for you for his sake.”

Screwing her eyes shut, Rin swallowed her next yawn. Kagome was absolutely right. Lord Sesshoumaru wouldn’t want Rin to harm herself on his behalf. But it wasn’t like staying up when she was awake anyway was such a big sacrifice. She was just a little tired. Sleepiness was not a terrible problem to have. Still, it was nice to hear someone else say something kind about Lord Sesshoumaru. Without Master Jaken around, that was surprisingly rare. “Yeah, I know.”

Of course Lord Sesshoumaru wasn’t selfish! He was a gallant hero, dashing, kind and generous. Kagome’s friends liked to pretend he wasn’t compassionate and magnanimous, but they couldn’t deny he came to the village to protect them when Inuyasha could not. Sango liked to tease and say he only did that because Rin lived here, that Lord Sesshoumaru would stop coming if she were ever to move away.

“Sometimes,” Rin confessed, “I feel like when we talk about Lord Sesshoumaru, everyone is talking about somebody else.”

Kagome was quiet for a moment. “I think it’s harder for us to understand him, that’s all.”

There was truth to that, no doubt. Lord Sesshoumaru visited often, but he never stayed long or spoke much to anyone but Rin. Everyone else’s relationship with him was superficial. The friends Rin made in the village had been curious about him at first, but they had all outgrown notions of mystique. Kagome’s group all had pictures in their heads of who they thought Lord Sesshoumaru was and whenever he failed to be that, it was never because they were wrong--it was because he _used_ to be that way and Rin _changed_ him.

Well. They all had their own experiences with him and had seen behaviors she couldn’t speak to, not having been there, but the idea she was capable of changing anyone sounded rather outlandish. Lord Sesshoumaru was the master of Tenseiga. Bakusaiga slept within him all his life. _If_ he seemed different, and _if_ it was because of her, all Rin had done was make him more true to himself.

“I am sure about the selfishness thing, though,” Kagome said. “That he isn’t, I mean.” She worked as she spoke. “When I first came back to this era, I was surprised Sesshoumaru had left you in the village instead of taking you with him. Inuyasha told me what Kaede had said and eventually I realized that Sesshoumaru _chose_ to listen to her. He didn’t have to, but he couldn’t be selfish.”

Rin frowned. Half-heartedly, she tugged on a weed. It didn’t budge. She flexed her fingers. Stupid tired hands and their stupid bad grip. “I don’t think Kaede gave him a choice.” Just because the priestess could not physically force a great demon to do anything did not mean she left room for argument.

“Well, either way, he agreed, didn’t he? He knew if you stayed with him, you’d have grown up not knowing anything but how to follow him, and that’s not fair to you.”

Rin wrinkled her nose. “Sounds fair to me!”

“You have friends,” Kagome replied. “You’ve learned about medicine and midwifery. You know how to cook and keep house and take care of yourself. These are all things you couldn’t have learned with demons. Knowing who you are and what you’re capable of makes you better at judging who you want to be. I bet Sesshoumaru would have been happy if you stayed with him all along, but would you have been happy? Would you even know if you were happy if you hadn’t been able to test out other things? That’s what I mean. He wasn’t selfish.”

Kagome took a very altruistic view of the situation. When she was young, Rin had regarded Lord Sesshoumaru abandoning her as the very height of selfishness. He had discarded the burdensome little human he wasted so much time protecting in order to have the freedom to do many other wonderful and exciting things.

It wasn’t fair to him. Rin knew Lord Sesshoumaru never thought she was a burden.

Still, the whole idea of separating them so that she could _choose_ to go back to him later always sounded ridiculous. It wasted an awful lot of time.

“I would have been happy,” Run murmured. “And I’d have known it, too.”

“Do you remember when I was gone?”

Incredulous in spite of herself dismissing it just moments ago, Rin cried, “It was three entire years! Of course I remember!” Inuyasha had gone to the well every three days, faithfully waiting. There was some other woman in his past that made Miroku and Shippou tease him for supposed infidelities, but Rin had never seen anything but the utmost devotion to Kagome.

“I think the well closed because of me. I was torn between two sets of people I loved--Inuyasha and everyone on this side, and my mother and grandfather and brother on the other side. My family worried about me so much. I couldn’t break their hearts again by leaving. So the well stayed closed up.”

Rin gave the story the rapt attention it deserved, though she had never understood how there could be a whole other world in the bottom of a well or why only two people could go there.

“I went to school,” Kagome said. “I studied and I did what was expected of me. And I loved my family and my friends. When my heart was strong enough to pick Inuyasha-- _really pick him_ \--the well opened up again and let me come home. If I never went back after making the Shikon Jewel disappear, if I had just stayed here the entire time, I’d still have married Inuyasha. I would still be a priestess. But making the choice was important. It’s better that I got to make it. I know this is the life I _want,_ not the life that happened to me.”

Rin wasn’t going to argue with that. If Kagome said she felt that way, then Kagome felt that way. “I would always pick Lord Sesshoumaru. Right away, no matter what. He’s the most important person to me.”

“He feels the same way about you.”

With a sharp inhale, Rin wondered, “Did he say that?”

“No. He doesn’t have to. Everyone who’s met the two of you knows it.”

Well, her lord’s enemies could certainly tell. Rin had been used against him more times than she could count! She didn’t relish being a pawn. She wanted…

“I’m in love with him.” 

Kagome laughed. It was a good natured laugh, like she was so delighted by the news she couldn’t help it. “Does he know?”

He _should._ Rin flushed. She wasn’t sure what other label someone might try to put on her feelings. Friendship, maybe. If she were to resume traveling with him, and Lord Sesshoumaru was only interested in friendship, that would be alright. Things couldn’t be how they used to be, when he would leave without any explanation and she would have to wait faithfully for his return. She’d outgrown _that._ He would have to tell her things. He would have to indulge her human emotions when she needed assurance.

Unless…

That was something he simply was not equipped to do.

Humans and demons had relationships. Rin knew that. Lord Sesshoumaru’s own brother was the product of a human-demon tryst. Jinenji’s human mother remembered her demon lover fondly. Shiori’s human mother lamented the death of hers. Rin saw herself in how these women adored their demons, but she certainly did not know the dynamics of the relationships. She didn’t know if any of them had had the sort of relationship she imagined having with Lord Sesshoumaru.

“What do you think,” Rin said cautiously, “would happen if I told him?”

Kagome pursed her lips. “I don’t know. You know him so much better than I do.”

Studying her fingernails--which ought to be dirtier, considering she was nominally weeding the garden--Rin asked, “Do you think he loves me?”

“I know he loves you,” Kagome answered. Rin’s triumph was doomed. “But that doesn’t mean he loves you the way you want to be loved.”

That was the crux of the matter, wasn’t it? Rin loved lots of people--Kaede and Kagome and Inuyasha and Kohaku and Jaken and A-Un and all her friends in the village--but her heart chose Lord Sesshoumaru. He was her home. He was her future. She wanted to whisper to him at night and learn his every goal and help him achieve them. She wanted to indulge him and inspire him and kiss him until he was so lost to passion his lips became a muzzle.

“Inuyasha likes to say he has a demon heart and a human heart.” Kagome picked the leaves off the weed in her hand, anxiously, like she wasn’t sure if she was helping or hurting. “He always says he loves me with his human heart. It’s his way of dealing with human feelings and demon feelings. I honestly don’t know how similar human desires and demon desires really are, and I’m married to someone who has both. Inuyasha only lets me see one side. Sesshoumaru might want the same things you do, but he might not.”

They may be incapable of being what the other needed.

What a terrible thought!

Rin fell silent.

“You should still tell him,” Kagome added softly. “He might not give you the answer you want, but he might. And if he doesn’t...it’s better to know, isn’t it?”

“You’re right. I’ll tell him.”

After all, silence was scary.

* * *

She didn’t tell him.

It wasn’t that she had made the decision not to, or that she was suddenly overcome by shyness. Fate simply hadn’t been with her. Between the conversation with Kagome seeming far more important than some silly weeds and her own exhaustion making her best work impossible, tending to the garden had taken far longer than it should have. Rin was behind on her chores for the rest of the day, always struggling to get back on schedule, to do the work the way it ought to be done. 

Life in a village certainly was demanding! One would think to simply live required so much! Sustaining her human life had had all the same demands when she was a child in the wilderness, but without participating in the give and take of society, fulfilling those needs had been far less strenuous. The forest provided almost everything, and when it could not, she stole. Now she had to purchase everything with labor. The price of rice and fish and a roof over her head was high. Even when there was no work to be done, being a young, able-bodied adult meant never consuming more than you gave, so you had to find some.

By late afternoon, Rin had gone home to collapse onto her futon and sleep. She woke up well after supper time to a cold dinner and Kaede less than pleased with the day’s output. Rin was wide awake now, energized and ready to do something! She knew better than to suppose that something would be to go outside and watch over the village with Lord Sesshoumaru. Kaede didn’t let her do that on a normal night much less one where Rin had already proven how poor her performance would be the next day.

Rin caught nothing but fleeting glances of Lord Sesshoumaru through the window. Master Jaken and A-Un had found him.

Lord Sesshoumaru was so beautiful in the starlight.

She had always known he was beautiful of course. It was probably the first thing anyone noticed about him! His height and breadth promised strength while his features were delicate and lovely. His skin was so pale, his markings so vivid one might almost think he was made out of porcelain and paint. Such long, unbound hair would be a hindrance in battle for any human warrior, but Lord Sesshoumaru’s never seemed to give him a moment’s concern. 

As he passed, Rin caught his eye and waved through the window.

She would have to wait to tell him.

* * *

Most of the marriages in the village were not love matches. If anything, affection for one’s spouse was considered something of a disadvantage. Rin was no stranger to the typical arguments against a love match. Love complicated the hierarchy of the household if a husband cared more for his wife than for his parents. Men who loved their wives did not expect them to work hard. Beloved spouses were too coddled. When respect ceased to be paramount, resentment took its place.

What no one whispered about with disapproval was the _anxiety_ that came with being in love. When Lord Sesshoumaru was gone, and Rin had nothing but her thoughts of him, she was less sure she could survive if her feelings were unrequited. Lord Sesshoumaru loved her, she told herself. It became her mantra: _do not do Lord Sesshoumaru the disservice of doubting him!_

But what if the ways they loved were too different, and they lost everything? 

What if the knowledge she desired him killed his affection for her?

What if he was embarrassed or disgusted or saw a corpse when he looked at her? 

Rin stewed in anxiety for three weeks, and then Lord Sesshoumaru returned.

He was not wearing armor.

She had seen him without armor before. When she had first found him, he had been lying injured on the forest floor, torn leather around his waist the only indication he’d even worn any. The battle had been so fierce his chest plate and pauldron had been destroyed. Every time his armor was broken--and it had happened a few more times since--or his clothing tore, it repaired itself.

Lord Sesshoumaru’s human-like form was a guise created by his demonic essence. His appearance was consistent, but that did not make it true. He was a dog who masqueraded as a man because his high birth required it. His clothing was part of the spell. He did not remove and wash it. His armor could break and cloth could tear and fray, but as his battle drained demonic energy replenished itself, his armor and clothing healed just as surely as his body did.

Tenseiga and Bakusaiga were still at his hip, but they were held fast by the belt of his hakama rather than the long sash he usually wore.

It was _fascinating._

“Lord Sesshoumaru! You took your armor off! I didn’t know you could do that!”

Rin imagined Lord Sesshoumaru’s life as a series of splendid battles in which he proved his might. Although..naturally, he had no equals, so perhaps he engaged in fewer conflicts than Master Jaken’s tales seemed to imply. He roamed the countryside in armor, swords at the ready. Rin always assumed he came to her after one victory and before another.

“How come you took it off? When are you going to put it back on? Do you have to transform to change your clothes?”

Rallying a defense of his sartorial choices did not rank especially high on the list of things Lord Sesshoumaru felt compelled to do. He remained silent and impassive. With Master Jaken present, Lord Sesshoumaru was absolved of any need to answer questions.

“Lord Sesshoumaru can take his armor off whenever he pleases, you foolish girl!”

When they were apart, and she had nothing but her thoughts of him, Rin wondered.

When they were together, and his silence was familiar and her curiosity insatiable and Master Jaken was there to bridge the gap between what one didn’t say and the other didn’t know, Rin knew this would always be her family. Lord Sesshoumaru and Rin--they would always, always go together, always, always kindred spirits. And if humans and demons did not love the same way, it didn’t change that it _was_ love, not one bit.

After he was gone, Rin realized she was so caught up by the mystery of his missing armor that she didn’t tell him how she felt.

* * *

The new moon came again, and so did Lord Sesshoumaru. He came prepared for combat, armor and all. The village was generally a safe place. It had come under attack, but rarely. Still, to a half-demon like Inuyasha, nothing could be taken for granted. Rin didn’t think it was an agreement the brothers had come to, necessarily, because she didn’t think they ever actually talked about it. Or anything, if they could help it. Lord Sesshoumaru brought security to the village when Inuyasha was vulnerable and if they didn’t want to fill the air with _pleases_ and _thank yous_ , that was their business. 

For Rin, there was an unexpected swell of calm when she saw his armor. He looked so familiar. He matched her mental picture of him precisely. Lord Sesshoumaru was capable of greater variation than she knew, but he remained himself. Still her hero, just as he had always been. Just as he always would be. Rin admired his strength and his resolve. He was unflappable, unbeatable, reliable like no one else. 

A great demon beyond compare.

Maybe she didn’t want to marry him. Maybe she was in awe of him and too naive to tell the difference.

* * *

One week later, Lord Sesshoumaru returned. This time, he came dressed in a blue kimono so dark it was nearly black. It was only when she stood very close to him that Rin could see the ribbed texture of the fabric and the subtle stitches of his flower crest, still present but hiding itself by only being a thin outline. His hair was swept over his left shoulder in a loose, thick braid. Instead of boots, he wore black socks and sandals. Though Rin could not imagine Lord Sesshoumaru without his fur, it looked almost out of place against such an outfit.

It was fascinating. It seemed strange to think that she had once been shocked by a simple lack of armor. She hardly knew where to begin dissecting this!

“You braided your hair!” It was only with the greatest degree of self control that Rin refrained from touching it. She had more than a few fantasies about his hair herself. It had always seemed strange that Lord Sesshoumaru had so much hair yet never styled it. “I’ve never seen you do that before!”

Lord Sesshoumaru looked at the braid from the corner of his eye. “When you traveled with me, I had one arm.”

He was not especially inclined to be forthcoming. Rin wondered if he realized how much information that single sentence contained. They had traveled together for a few months. He has visited her in the village for years. The visits were brief, never lasting longer than a few hours. There was a distance between them now that did not exist when they were traveling. A relationship made up of visits meant everything was too short, too composed for unguarded moments unless they were purposefully orchestrated, like his clothing. She had seen him vulnerable when she was younger, honest, spontaneous vulnerability. If he had two arms in those moments, would he have tried to hide it by busying himself with his hair?

Secondly, and more suited to follow-up questions--“Then you braid with your hands? You don’t just...demonic essence yourself that way?”

Thirdly, and absolutely unsuited to follow-up questions--if he were to say, lie on top of her, would his hair cascade around her like a silver waterfall as she had always imagined, or would he braid it first to keep it out of the way? There was something comforting in such utterly base wonderings. Rin knew they did not spring up from respect and admiration.

“I have a degree of control over this guise,” Lord Sesshoumaru answered, “but if my hair is to be tied, I must do it by hand.”

He controlled what he looked like? With mirth, Rin cried accusingly, “You make yourself so beautiful on purpose!”

Lord Sesshoumaru’s brow furrowed slightly.

Rin bit her lip to reign in giggles. No one with such a power would choose to be unattractive, after all! But also… “How much do you control?” Lord Sesshoumaru’s mother and Inuyasha were not related to one another, but they both had silver hair and gold eyes. That must be a trait of dog demons in general.

“My hair white. My eyes are yellow. The markings stay. The rest is malleable.”

She was giddy and a bit annoyed. He chose to be so unfairly beautiful. He chose to have such fine, delicate features. He chose to be so tall. 

“Do your ears have to be pointy?”

“Yes.” 

“What about your eyelids?”

“The markings stay.”

“Your hair is so thick. If I braided my hair, it would be so thin and sad compared to yours.” Rin gathered her hair over her shoulder and raked it with her fingers. Not to demonstrate, precisely, but she had to find something else for her hands to do before they ended up reaching out for his hair. Rin sectioned off her hair and crossed it over a few times, the beginnings of a braid that could never rival his.

Lord Sesshoumaru folded his arms in his sleeves, giving the impression he was bored of this conversation and no longer inclined to participate.

“I always wanted to braid your hair when I was little,” Rin confessed. She wouldn’t mind braiding it now!

_That_ brought him back. She wasn’t sure if it would. “You said nothing.”

Rin stuck out her tongue. “I only ask you for things if I think you’re going to say yes.” 

Lord Sesshoumaru did not argue further.

* * *

Two days brought him back again, unexpectedly. Lord Sesshoumaru had come in the midst of some grand adventure Rin knew nothing about. She could tell because he wore his battle-ready outfit. Armor, crest blazing white on red on white. His hair flowed loose down his back. The swords at his hip were slung in the sash that always accompanied his armor. Whatever he was doing, it was serious--his left hand gripped Bakusaiga’s hilt the entire time. 

The neglect of their quest made Master Jaken glare and grumble. Lord Sesshoumaru stayed only long enough to press three ribbons into Rin’s palm, and then he was gone as suddenly as he appeared.

Rin was, for a long moment, utterly mystified. Lord Sesshoumaru often brought gifts, but never something as inconsequential as a bit of ribbon or with so little fanfare. She stared at the ribbons without comprehension until realizing--

He brought her hair ties.

They had been talking about hair the other day, and he brought her ribbons for her hair.

Rin hated that she had no idea what adventure took him away so soon or what new enemy he was chasing, but the ribbons felt oddly momentous. He had brought her many things, large, expensive, beautiful things reflective of his aristocratic status. To offer three ribbons for her hair was so…

_intimate._

Lovesick, Rin sighed over the ribbons all evening.

* * *

The new moon came.

Lord Sesshoumaru’s having appeared twice in the first fortnight made Rin hopeful she would see him again before Inuyasha’s period of vulnerability demanded it, but evidently, his quest kept him busy. She spent weeks longing to see him, planning what she might say to him and experimenting with her hair and the ribbons. Kaede must think she was growing very vain! 

Autumn dawned, and Rin was delighted for it because longer nights meant new moon visits began earlier. Kaede never let her sit all night with Lord Sesshoumaru, but when the sun set in the early evening, she could not forbid Rin from visiting a little bit. 

She waited for him on the shrine steps. Lord Sesshoumaru traveled so much he never seemed to come into the village from the same direction or in the same way. Sometimes he walked out of the woods. Other times, he flew and landed somewhere in town. Very rarely, he rode A-Un. From the top of the steps, she could see most of the village. There, Rin had the best chance of spotting his approach.

The sky grew dark, but she didn’t see Lord Sesshoumaru. 

The new moon was important. He wouldn’t be _late._ What if someone wanted to hurt Inuyasha? Miroku’s wind tunnel was gone, Sango was out of practice. Without Lord Sesshoumaru, the village’s only defense was Kagome’s sacred arrows.

Rin swallowed a lump in her throat.

What if his quest kept him away? 

What if he were injured?

_No one knew._ Who would nurse him? 

That was absurd. No one could hurt Lord Sesshoumaru. He was too powerful. Being impaled through the chest didn’t slow him down. Who could even get near him when he had Bakusaiga?

Rin shuffled down the steps.

Coming on the night of the new moon was a _kindness._ No one was owed Lord Sesshoumaru’s protection. He was allowed to choose not to show up. He had his own life.

She was being ridiculous.

The hut where Kaede and Rin lived was at the bottom of the steps. Rin took a deep breath. She was not going to cry to Kaede that Lord Sesshoumaru did not come. Lord Sesshoumaru was _fine._ She squared her shoulders and pushed the entrance mat aside.

“Rin!”

She took a step back.

Master Jaken got up. “Where have you been? How could you make Lord Sesshoumaru wait for you?”

She blinked.

Kaede sat at the hearth drinking tea. Lord Sesshoumaru sat well away from the priestess, his back against the wall, swords leaning against his shoulder.

Rin gaped.

She shut her mouth. 

_Not fair!_ He never came inside!

“I was looking for you outside, my lord. I was starting to think you weren’t coming.”

Not quite disinterested, but nearly so, Lord Sesshoumaru asked, “What have I done that you have so little faith in me?”

Nothing at all! Rin smiled and spread her arms wide. “Welcome to our house!”

It probably did not look like much to him. Lord Sesshoumaru did not have a house himself as far as Rin knew, but his mother lived in a castle in the sky. If he were accustomed to anything, it would be opulence. Kaede’s hut was simple. One room. An elevated floor for cooking and sleeping. The walls were lined with pots of seeds, herbs and persevered food. Rin had a chest of drawers for her possessions. The chest was a gift from Lord Sesshoumaru, as were most of the things within.

“This suits you?” Lord Sesshoumaru asked.

Rin said, “Yes,” because Kaede was present and she did not want to insult the woman’s home, but she felt like the question had been asked with skepticism and he wanted a different answer.

When he tired of being confined in doors, Lord Sesshoumaru left.

* * *

Three weeks later, Master Jaken arrived at Kaede’s door holding three scrolls in his arms. They were not meant to be held by a demon so tiny. He tottered and struggled to hold them. “From Lord Sesshoumaru!”

With the smallest of laughs, Rin took the scrolls. It was not as if she thought Master Jaken would be an envoy sent by anyone else! She laid them on the bureau carefully so that they would not roll off, then selected one to open.

It was _beautiful._

A decorative scroll meant to hang on the wall, it depicted pink-purple flowers whose centers were star-shaped. 

“Sakurasou.”

Rin looked up. Lord Sesshoumaru stood in the doorway.

He took her breath away, yet somehow she was still able to cry, “Thank you!”

“You had no flowers.”

Her heart ached with love for him. In Lord Sesshoumaru’s eyes, the little house did not suit her because _there were no flowers._ And he corrected that by bringing her paintings. He brought her flowers that would bloom year-round and never wilt.

The next scroll, she recognized. “Sunflowers! I love it! Thank you!”

Lord Sesshoumaru’s eyes narrowed.

The final scroll depicted stalks of purple flowers. Rin looked questioningly to Lord Sesshoumaru.

“Lavender.” He turned to Master Jaken. “Hang them up.”

Master Jaken’s height was not at all suited to the task of hanging scrolls on the walls. Laughingly, Rin tried to assist him despite his insistence that he did not need her help. Lord Sesshoumaru sat in the corner and watched them silently, all the while combing his hair with his fingers.

* * *

Life in a human village was a life with very little privacy. 

The following month, Lord Sesshoumaru spent some of the new moon visit indoors. Kaede or Master Jaken were always present. Rin could hardly confess her love in front of Kaede! She would be less embarrassed to say it in front of Master Jaken, but if she did, Rin knew _he_ would respond faster than Lord Sesshoumaru. If Lord Sesshoumaru should reject her, then Rin would allow Master Jaken yell at her for having the presumption to approach him at all, but she preferred to have her lord’s answer first. 

If she were going to confess, Rin would have to engineer some way to be alone with Lord Sesshoumaru! He disliked being manipulated. She would have to trick Master Jaken into leaving them somehow. Contemplating how to do it was at least a new thing to think about. 

It distracted her from worrying about his response.

* * *

When Lord Sesshoumaru next came to the village, it was with his entire entourage in tow. He had apparently found humor in making Master Jaken carry things much too large for him, for the little demon struggled with a basket two-thirds his size. A-Un wore saddle bags. There seemed no reason the dragon could not carry the basket’s contents but the whim of Lord Sesshoumaru.

When Master Jaken set the basket down, Rin peered inside. Oranges! Six of them, at least, round and ripe despite the earliness of the season. Master Jaken removed A-Un’s muzzles and gave each head one of the oranges. They ate the fruit whole, juice dribbling from their mouths when they burst through the rinds. Master Jaken went to work unpacking the saddle bags next.

“Can I have an orange?”

“You are so impatient!” Master Jaken huffed.

Rin took that as a yes. She grabbed one from the basket and sat on her heels. Peeling an orange was an unpleasant task, but the fruit was worth it! Rin bit into the rind, tore a chunk off with her teeth and spat it out. The rind tasted terrible but her fingernails were not sharp enough to pierce all the way through. Now that she’d removed a section, she could dig beneath the rind and peel it all off. 

Master Jaken rummaged through A-Un’s saddle bag until he found a lacquered tray, which he triumphantly presented to his lord. Instructions apparently completed, Master Jaken took an orange for himself and ate it whole, rind and all.

Lord Sesshoumaru scrutinized the basket. There were two oranges left, maybe a third if a small one was hidden from view when the basket was full. He reached in slowly, as if he wasn’t sure he would like what he found. The orange he pulled out was examined from every angle.

(Rin tried to discreetly spit seeds on the ground.)

Lord Sesshoumaru held the orange with one hand. With the thumb claw of his other, he pierced the rind, and spinning the orange, cut the entire thing off in one long peel. Some white skin still clung to the fruit along the spines of each section. Lord Sesshoumaru methodically pulled the skin off each one with the claw of his forefinger and thumb. Then, he separated the sections and laid them all out in a line on the tray. Ten perfect orange slices. It was all very neat and picturesque. Rin’s orange still had a lot of skin clinging to it. Several of the sections had been gouged by her sticky fingers. 

Watching Lord Sesshoumaru peel an orange resulted in the strangest queasy feeling in her stomach. Rin almost couldn’t believe he’d done it in the first place, and she didn’t know why he would. He didn’t peel an orange for her. She was already eating one when he began and he had never assisted her with food before. Rin waited with baited breath.

He ate one section.

It was the most tidy eating of an orange Rin had ever seen. He did not spit out the seed nor pluck it out of his mouth with his fingers. He did not bite the section in half but put the whole thing in his mouth at once. There was no juice on his fingers or his lips.

Then, just as neatly as the first, Lord Sesshoumaru ate four more sections of his orange. Five perfect slices were still arranged on his tray. He stared at them. 

Rin imagined, in a half-mad sort of way, taking his hands and kissing his cheeks and lips until he was as sticky with orange juice as she. He looked too perfect for someone who had wrestled with one of the most difficult of fruits! 

Lord Sesshoumaru vanquished such fantasies by picking up his tray and placing it on Rin’s lap. “I don’t want the rest of this.”

Half of an orange was the most she’d ever seen him eat. In retrospect, Rin was amazed he’d done it all! 

“You eat fruit,” she said, dazed.

“Only a little,” he answered.

Rin put what was left of her unattractively peeled orange on the tray beside his five, unwanted sections. She could not eat an orange and a half in one sitting, nor could she reject his offering.

“Do you like melons?” She used to steal melons two or three at a time and cart them around on their travels so that she would have something to eat for days without stopping to forage.

“It’s not a matter of likes and dislikes.”

Had she ever offered him any? When had she begun believing him when he said he didn’t eat what she ate? “Then what is it?”

“Melons are too big. I eat so little. It’s wasteful.”

_“Not if we share!”_

It hurt, it hurt, all the things she could have offered him but never had. Why not? Why had it taken _him_ giving _her_ oranges to realize she could cared for him better? A tear splashed on the tray.

“Rin.” He sounded lost. Lord Sesshoumaru didn’t understand why she was crying.

Neither did she. Was it because she could have loved him more? Was it because they were so different she couldn’t love him well?

“I’m sorry.” She dashed at her eyes with the back of her hand. It wasn’t sticky. “I didn’t mean--this wasn’t easy for you. I don’t want you to think I don’t appreciate it. I _do._ I promise. I...” Rin squeezed her eyes shut. 

Two not sticky, neat and elegant fingers slid beneath her jaw and tilted her head to face him. “What?” Lord Sesshoumaru urged softly. “Tell me.”

“I’m sorry,” Rin said again. “I ruined your visit. This was so nice and I ruined it.”

Lord Sesshoumaru dropped his hand and turned away. 

After Rin recovered herself, Lord Sesshoumaru left. It was kind of him to wait until she had calmed down. Her confused tears would have become the most bitter of weeping had he left when she was still upset. And, he did not make Master Jaken pack the saddle bags. Lord Sesshoumaru let her keep the tray and the basket. “You may give the final orange to the priestess, if you like.”

* * *

_He put his hands on her!_

Well. One hand.

Well. Two fingers.

In Rin’s imagination, when Lord Sesshoumaru tilted her head to make her face him, it wasn’t because he expected her to finish her sentence. In Rin’s imagination, he leaned in and kissed her. 

It was a powerful fantasy. Rin had long imagined herself kissing him. She had a library of mental stories where she kissed him and he passively accepted all that she wished to do to him and another where she kissed him and he responded with a passion that suggested his lust was equal to hers, he had just been waiting for her to show him he was wanted. Now she was building a series of fantasies where _his_ desire boiled over first. Where wordlessly, he tilted her head to an angle that suited him and kissed her. Or where he grabbed her, pulled her close and kissed her.

Rin lapsed into daydreaming far more often than she should.

Her chores kept her mind in the present and when she was finished with them, the fact that she was rarely alone to indulge. A lull in a conversation, and Lord Sesshoumaru was in her thoughts, kissing her--but then someone spoke, and he was gone. While walking from one patient to another, she could invent entire conversations. Sometimes, Lord Sesshoumaru told her he loved her, other times, how badly he wanted her. He was a man of few words. Canvassing both topics in one go seemed unlike him.

Rin had the entire house to herself.

One of the village women had had a birth that couldn’t be described as anything less than traumatic. Kaede intended to stay with the family for at least a few days. Rin was to come by every day with fresh supplies, but they were not both needed all the time and Kaede had more experience. 

The silence was deafening.

When had Rin become so ill-equipped to be alone? She had taken care of herself after the death of her family. She’d done a poor job of it at first, was often dirty and hungry, but she had survived. Solitude was something she could bear. Something she _preferred_ to the company of the other villagers. 

Now she hated it.

Idle petulance at Kaede’s absence soon turned to Lord Sesshoumaru. After all, it was not the priestess who taught her to trust others again. It was the demon who saw her reach out in compassion, and as no one else had ever bothered to do, reached back. Her faith in Kaede, and Kagome, Inuyasha and Kohaku before could only thrive because Lord Sesshoumaru had shown her that faith in the goodness of others could be rewarded.

And still, she had not told him that she loved him. The months had given her so many opportunities! But every time, she embraced the moment for what it was, never finding a means to ensure a little privacy and move forward with her own agenda. Lord Sesshoumaru still had so much more of himself to show her! Eating half an orange was almost beyond her imagination! His casual kimono and thick braid were so different from what she expected. How many more revelations did he have? Should she wait until he had shown her everything? Or was loving him meant to be a mystery uncovered slowly? 

And what about him opening his kimono, sliding it off his shoulders to show her his broad chest and toned stomach? How many more markings did his clothing hide? Would he ever show her all of them?

Her hand--mind of its own, that hand--drifted over her belly and down to the apex of her thighs. Sleeping in the same one room hut as Kaede granted very little privacy. Rin would never explore the sensitive regions of her body in the presence of the old priestess. But she was alone, would be alone all night, and her mind had conjured images of Lord Sesshoumaru naked, and of course he would touch her, he would prick her with his claws, he would rock his hips, he would put his mouth every obscene place Rin desired…

Afterwards, Rin crawled out of her futon to clean her hand. 

Despite the hour, she was wide awake. Rin eyed her bed. She was too energized to sleep. If she were to lie down again, she would probably just create more scenarios about Lord Sesshoumaru. Rin bit her lip. She was deeply tempted. Chances like this would not come around again. But she also felt a twinge of shame. Rin hadn’t _used_ him; he didn’t _know._ But did that mean such detailed fantasies were okay?

With a sigh of indecision, Rin went to the window and opened the slats.

And dropped immediately to her behind on the floor.

_He was outside._

Why was he outside?

Did he come to the village while everyone was asleep often? Had she simply never caught him before? Any other time, Kaede’s absence would have meant the freedom to run outside and greet him, but Rin was certain Lord Sesshoumaru would be able to smell what she had done. How could she get through a conversation with him knowing she smelled as she did? 

For the first time in her life, Rin whispered, “Lord Sesshoumaru, please go away.”

* * *

By the time the new moon rolled around, Rin was able to greet Lord Sesshoumaru with confidence. She insisted he come inside to see how the flower scrolls made her home so cheerful. She offered him one quarter of a peeled pear, which he ate. Lord Sesshoumaru ate fruit, but he did not like food he considered _human,_ which, now that she had had some more time to think about it, prompted an inquisition.

“Will you eat cooked fruit?”

“No.”

“What about pickled plums?”

“No.”

“If I’d left the skin on the pear, would you have still eaten it?”

“Yes.”

Rin wrinkled her nose. “You aren't supposed to eat the skin.” 

She did not see him again until the next new moon.

* * *

Inuyasha had never liked the frequency with which his brother came, but when it became clear the intermediate visits were a thing of the past, he grew irate. As long as Lord Sesshoumaru continued to come, safety wasn’t an issue, but if anyone was paying attention, the pattern would be clear. It had been three months. Should Lord Sesshoumaru decide one day that he had helped enough, the damage was done. An enemy might not know _why_ the night of the new moon was the time to attack, but they would know that it was.

Rin waited for Kaede to fall asleep and then snuck out. Lord Sesshoumaru would never tell her what changed. He may pretend nothing had. But there was someone who would. By his side night and day, no one understood Lord Sesshoumaru better than Master Jaken.

She tiptoed through the sleeping village, bundled in layers of kimono now that winter was truly upon them. Rin wandered, knowing they were somewhere near, but no idea where. Lord Sesshoumaru’s habits were so difficult! Sometimes, he meandered around the village. Sometimes, he stood sentry from the shrine gate. He might float overhead or walk circles around the parameter of the village.

When she finally found them, Rin wasted no time. “Master Jaken, why did Lord Sesshoumaru stop coming?”

Master Jaken seemed surprised to have been addressed directly. He looked between Rin and Lord Sesshoumaru. “What are you talking about? He is here right now!”

“But he doesn’t come in between new moons anymore.”

Turning smug, Master Jaken chided her. “You foolish human, you expect more than you deserve. You think you're entitled to his time?”

“No, I just don’t understand what changed so suddenly.” At first, Rin blamed herself. Lord Sesshoumaru knew what she had done that night and stayed away out of disgust. But with months to think about it, she realized the change in his behavior began before that. He had softened his manner of dress. He let her see him eat. He gave her presents that were tiny in scope but enormous in how they proved he was thinking of her. 

And then he went away.

Master Jaken was silent for a moment. And then he said, “I don’t know, either.”

“You must!”

“Lord Sesshoumaru is angry about something,” Master Jaken said, “has been for some time.” He peered at his lord to see if that observation would be punished, but the great demon was immobile. “I, Jaken, privy to his every interest, knows no justification for it. No one has challenged him or disrespected him!”

Rin frowned. “He doesn’t seem angry.” If Master Jaken were right, there would have been retaliation.

Master Jaken understood, too. “Frustrated, then.”

Lord Sesshoumaru’s expression grew menacing. 

Frustrated, it was!

Rin cocked her head. “Maybe if I ask him, he’ll tell me.”

“When you ask him,” cried Master Jaken, _“I_ tell you, and I don’t know!”

All good points, but she was out of options. Rin clasped her hands behind her back and shuffled to Lord Sesshoumaru’s side. His expression was not inviting. “Lord Sesshoumaru,” she pressed anyway, “are you well?”

He did not reply.

“Master Jaken and I are worried.”

“Your worry is wasted.”

Rin pursed her lips. She wasn’t surprised he shut her down, but she didn’t know if she could work the truth out of him, either. “It’s not,” she said, and she let the matter drop.

* * *

Until she didn’t.

Master Jaken told her once that Lord Sesshoumaru was always listening, that he knew the difference between idle chatter and when she needed him. If she needed him, he would come to her rescue. Never had she felt the need to test that. Rin trusted him.

But she had a genuine need now, and that was to know what was wrong.

The night was freezing, but Rin was past caring. She bundled herself up in boots and layers and went out to the meadow. Frost crunched between her feet with every step. 

When she arrived, Rin took a deep breath. “Lord Sesshoumaru!” she shouted. “You had better come! Because it’s very cold and I don’t want to stand out here all night!” Rin hunched her shoulders. She could see her every exhale. Just to keep warm, she walked in a tight circle, then jumped up and down. “Lord Sesshoumaru!”

“Rin.”

She relaxed. “Hi.”

He was battle ready.

“No,” Rin said. “I want the kimono.”

Lord Sesshoumaru regarded her for a moment. He was engulfed in light and when it faded, he no longer looked like he had come to kill something. With his left hand, he reached behind his head and gathered his hair over his shoulder.

There was something about the intimacy of the moment that drew from Rin, “Let me.”

He turned away from her, hair billowing behind him as he did so. When his hair stopped swaying, Rin stepped forward. She licked her lips and gathered his hair in her hands. It was so smooth. She combed it with her fingers as she’d seen him do. There were no knots or tangles. “Your neck is going to be cold.”

“The cold doesn’t bother me.”

Separating the hair into three sections, Rin said, “You dress like you want to be warm.”

“Do I?”

She began to braid. “You always wear fur!”

“I can only be what I am.”

Rin laughed. “What does that have to do with it?”

“Dog fur is part of my body.”

Wryly, she said, “You can take it off! I have seen you take it off!”

“In this form. Not in any of the others.”

“Oh, fine.” She reached the end of his hair. “I didn’t bring a hair tie.”

“I gave you three.” 

“I didn’t bring them! Believe it or not, my big plan wasn’t to braid your hair.”

Lord Sesshoumaru tore a strip of fabric from the sleeve of his kimono and handed it to her. Rin tied the end of the braid. She admired her work, then draped it over his shoulder. He turned to face her. 

“What are your intentions?”

“To get you talking to me.”

“Then what?”

“I mean,” Rin stressed, “I want you to tell me what’s wrong. Things can’t be like how when I was a kid and I never knew what was going on because you didn’t tell me anything. Your feelings are important to me and if something’s happening, then I want to know what. Especially if it means you’re pushing me and Jaken away.”

“Every word of that speech is vile.”

Rin glared at him. “That’s mean!”

“You think _I_ have something to tell _you.”_

She deflated. “I guess you don’t have to. I’d just like it if you did. Why don’t you trust me?”

Lord Sesshoumaru narrowed his eyes. Rin stood straight. It had been a long time since Lord Sesshoumaru could intimidate her. She refused to break eye contact.

When he moved, it was with speed she couldn’t even see. Rin collided with Lord Sesshoumaru’s body before she even realized he had grabbed her. One of his hands was on the back of her head, the other on her hip. As in her fantasies, he tilted her head the way he wanted. His mouth was hot against hers, insistent. Demanding. 

Rin’s fingers scrambled for something to grab onto. Her knees might buckle. One of her hands sunk into his fur and the _sound_ he made reverbated into her belly. With the other, she gripped his shoulder. 

His hunger was powerful. Instinct overrode rationality. Rin held him fast as his kisses gave way to frantic licks. Lord Sesshoumaru licked her lips, her cheek, her ear, her neck. His breath and saliva were so warm. She clung to him.

Hot wind engulfed Rin, too, when passion broke Lord Sesshoumaru's spell. 

An enormous white dog lowered his head to the ground and let out a sound that could only be called a whine. His tongue flicked out to lick his nose.

Laughing, Rin reached out to stroke his muzzle. “I love you!”

The words were spontaneous, entirely unplanned, though not unexpected. Immediately, Rin was glad she had said it to his dog form first. This was this true self. If she loved him, then she must love him for all that he was.

“I love you,” she repeated, softly. Tenderly.

He woofed. 

Rin pressed her face into his fur. “Turn back so you can talk to me.”

Lord Sesshoumaru obeyed. When the wind receded, her head was on his shoulder, his arms wrapped securely around her. His hair hung loose. Rin hugged him tight, threaded her fingers through his hair.

“That transformation undid all my good work.”

Lord Sesshoumaru released her. He stepped back, cupped Rin’s cheeks in his palms and made her look up at him. “I cannot speak for other demons,” he said, “but I love with the heart of a dog. You have long had my faithful devotion. There is nothing you can need that I will not provide.”

Lord Sesshoumaru was always listening.

“You heard me.”

He tilted his head.

“Every time I’ve talked to Kagome or ...myself about loving you, _you heard me.”_

Everything he had done had been to show her he was receptive. He patiently waited for a confession that never came. He asked her why she had so little faith. He told her to tell him. He said she worried too much.

When she whispered _please go away_ because she was too embarrassed to face him, he went away.

“I don’t know if it’s because I love you or if Tenseiga is keeping us connected--understand: you are a first for me in so many ways. But the things you need, the things you feel, they echo in my heart. I could not shut them out if I tried.”

Rin placed her hand on his cheek. “I’m sorry I took so long. I didn’t mean to hurt you.”

“A few months is very little to a demon. Don’t trouble yourself.”

She moved in close to hold him. “Has anyone ever told you that you are a very good dog?”

* * *

Sango was wrong.

Even after Rin moved away, Lord Sesshoumaru still came on the night of the new moon.

He brought his wife with him.

The wife of a great dog demon was, naturally, a devoted and obedient sort of woman. He wished for her to sit beside him all night on the shrine steps, so she did. It was a dull duty, guarding a village unlikely to be attacked. Company made it bearable. She told him the stars' stories until she fell asleep in his fur, which was exactly as inviting as it looked.


End file.
